Now that we have gotten past the time for New Year resolutions, the regret that we didn't make any or the embarrassment that we already fell off, my suggestion is that we move forward and position ourselves at a more realistic phase of all the new year challenges hooplah which I'm calling "who gives a damn anyway". And let's just have some Fun. Unscripted, unplanned, unashamed, unapologetic, and without reservation Fun.

After all the years of: being responsible by choice or by design; raising children then either shooing or kicking them out, or trying to keep them in the nest; managing our household – cooking, cleaning, budgeting time, resources and energy; loving, cherishing and be a great sexy and sex companion for our husbands and partners when they were worthy and when they have been undeserving - pissing us off; making time for family and friends when we were empty and just wanted to go somewhere and lay down; taking care of and relinquishing parents stoically, guiltily, and solemnly;

watching and experiencing the world change into something unfamiliar, hopeful and sometimes scary; building careers that did not always welcome or reward us; and oh, lest we forget (which we do all too often), loving, honoring and caring for ourselves with what was left; making time for fun is definitely in order.

But, before we get too puffed up with these real life accolades, I'm not saying we are always easy, nice, kind, or sweet and won’t /can’t deny that we also create our own craziness. The kind that will make the devil flinch, cause trouble to say "ouch" or wilt the bloom off the rose by what comes out of our mouths,

but for right here and right now….. Let's just have some well deserved and needed FUN. I'm pretty sure we haven't exhausted our fill so let's make room for even more.

And might I add, I know a lot of younger women who have been holding it down, caring for and handling the business and so they too are expressly invited to join in the Fun-fest.

Now for clarity sake and so we don't become confused, I would like to stop here and make a distinction between fun and enjoyment. Fun is action, movement, doing. Enjoyment I would categorize as more passive, watching rather than participating, felt rather than experienced. Can you have both? Absolutely and there is a time for each exclusively. But this rendition is about Fun. For example, I can enjoy myself walking on the beach, but the Fun comes from playing in the ocean. I enjoy putting on a stylish pair of high heels, but the Fun comes from what I do while I am wearing or kicking them off. I enjoy a good movie, but the Fun comes when I am creating my own magic.

And I enjoy the sounds of some good music – club, church, concert, don't matter. AAAAHHHH, but when I stand on my feet and sway, step or bop across the floor, or when my feet get to prancing and I raise my hands in ecstasy or surrender, or when I am in the midst of some hip-shaking or grinding grooves with my companions and the sweat starts beading on the top of my lip and across my forehead, I am in the action and throes of FUN.

Recently, I went to a skating party. Now I haven't been on skates in at least a couple of decades and even back then I wasn't a prolific skater. But I got all of the young’uns around me asking if I am going to go skating, with smiles plastered across their faces because they clearly think that I can't, the idea is ridiculous and yet at the same time want me to try because they just want to have fun with me. So I go get up on them skates and Lawd Have Mercy!!! My legs are moving all from up under me like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz when they take him down from the pole. And I'm thinking this isn't such a wise decision because I can't afford to go down. Nevertheless I was helped to the railing with a lot of trepidation and murmuring from my support system. And they left me there clinging to that rail like stink on a skunk. Finally after rolling back and forth and going nowhere I took a skate off and sat back down. Then came the taunting from my beloved grandson and a challenge from my lovely and sassy niece. (I had let her use my skates and after she zipped around the rink I told her to give them back because I thought her energy and fluidity would make me skate better (lol)). Again with much assistance, grunting, heckling and muffled giggles; I tried again and made it around that rink twice - thanks to the patience of my crew. I lacked poise, grace, stability and put strangers at risk. But I had a good time and laughed my ass off as I stumbled without falling, watched others hit the floor, saw families tumble across one another, and watched people laugh at my lack of agility. And it was FUN.

That night I slept like a baby. There were some risks involved in my having FUN, but it was worth it. There were some challenges I had to meet, but I met them. There was some embarrassment I had to endure, but I overcame it. There was nervousness, but I moved through it.

So without the fanfare of pledges or resolutions - Let's Just Have FUN.